i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
