I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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