why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
