I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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