Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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