I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
