I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
