end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
