everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Shame is for Republicans.
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