I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
