better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize