I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
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