Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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