Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
