Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
