Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
