You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
