Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
A+ Viking dick
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
