we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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