i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I understand Curling. That high.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize