i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
