No, drunk sperm still make babies.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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