Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize