I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
