Can Purell be used as lube?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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