why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
