hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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