apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
