I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize