I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
