I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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