all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
