Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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