You work out of a Hotel?
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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