i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize
