I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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