I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
