he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
We were destined to go to rehab together
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize