That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
