there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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