He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Randomize
