Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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