Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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