Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
