a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
