I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
