What did we do last night that was yellow?
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize