I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
