Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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