oh god the rape fog is back!
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
