look no pants
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Randomize