Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
