People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize