I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize